Obama Delegate Resigns After Remark

Newsvine – Obama Delegate Resigns After Remark

Linda Ramirez-Sliwinski, a trustee in the Chicago suburb of Carpentersville, was issued a $75 ticket for disorderly conduct after neighbors complained to police. She says the word wasn’t meant racially and she will fight the ticket.

…

The incident occurred Saturday, when two children were playing in a tree next door to Ramirez-Sliwinski’s house.

She said the parents were outside supervising the children, but she went over and told them to get out of the tree because she was concerned about the boys’ safety and because the small magnolia tree was being damaged.

The father of one of the boys told her it was none of her business, she told the Chicago Tribune, and “I calmly said the tree is not there for them to be climbing in there like monkeys.”

The mother of one boy called police.

Cmdr. Michael Kilbourne said Tuesday a ticket was issued because the ordinance bans conduct that disturbs or alarms people. One of the boys told police he was scared by her comment and a mother said she was disturbed, he said.

This is ridiculous. What next? No more “monkeying around”? No more playing on the “monkey” bars? Children, of all racial persuasions, have been compared to monkeys for just about ever. I doubt there was any racist intent behind these remarks, and the fact that she got CITED for saying it should absolutely be contested.

But the worst is the retarded media picks it up and runs with it because she’s in some way connected with OBAMA and he is BLACK (partly) and this is about RACE and WELL DUH! So now it’s a big story. As if this incident had anything to do with him in any way. Lazy fucking sensationalistic hacks.

Insanity.

Oddball Headline of the Day

N.J. Cop Shot in Stabbing Case

I assume that the actual article makes this headline make sense. But really.

Are you kidding me with this?

What. The. Penguin. Fuck?

Please note that this trash is in the WASHINGTON FUCKING POST, not your local Baptist church’s weekly bulletin.

We Scream, We Swoon. How Dumb Can We Get? – washingtonpost.com

So I don’t understand why more women don’t relax, enjoy the innate abilities most of us possess (as well as the ones fewer of us possess) and revel in the things most important to life at which nearly all of us excel: tenderness toward children and men and the weak and the ability to make a house a home. (Even I, who inherited my interior-decorating skills from my Bronx Irish paternal grandmother, whose idea of upgrading the living-room sofa was to throw a blanket over it, can make a house a home.) Then we could shriek and swoon and gossip and read chick lit to our hearts’ content and not mind the fact that way down deep, we are . . . kind of dim.

Worn-Out Phrases

If I never have to hear one more person say “If you don’t like the weather here in ‘_____’ – just wait five minutes! HARDEE Har HAR!” It will be too damn soon. What is with people – like they think no one has ever heard that shit before? Like every place doesn’t have changeable weather?

Fuck off with that, especially if you’re a TV weather presenter, FFS.

…and that is what, exactly?

A coked-out junkie whore who is old and worn before her time and favors withered-up florida-lady housecoats?

And we’re supposed to support this and/or find it attractive and appealing? She has corpse eyes.

Fucking Fuckwitted Jeff City Fucktards

You know it’s going to take a lot to make me hopping mad when I have a broken foot, but this almost gets me there. And what’s even more fucked-up (though not unexpected) is that despite this bill being all over the blogsphere, as of this posting the Post Dispatch’s site makes no mention of it at all.  Why am I not surprised? Karaoke cycling does get a really good write-up though.

Broadsheet: Missouri “abortifacient” bill both wrong and wrong

Well, clearly they’ve fixed everything else in Missouri, as lawmakers there are now able to turn their attention to fatuous bills addressing pretend situations. The recently introduced HB 1625 would — contrary to the position of the Food and Drug Administration and virtually the entire medical community — classify emergency contraception (as in Plan B) as an “abortifacient.” It would also allow pharmacies to refuse to dispense both Plan B and RU-486 (mifepristone), shielding them from any resulting legal action.

Holy Airbrush Batman

What the FUG did Vogue do to my Drew?

That is NOT her face. Those are not her eyes. Those are for SURE not her cheekbones. What is happening with her right eye there? That angle of eye-socket to cheekbone transition is NOT found in nature.

Either Drew has been in an accident and has some serious bad reconstruction under her belt, or there is a stoned out “intern” at Vogue’s HQ who’s going to get shitcanned for that. (Or needs to.)

God, I SO want to see the original of this photo. Wonder if Jezebel could get it for me?

Shit – you know what this looks like? Like Drew got hit in the face with Gwenyth Paltrow. Even the stupid-ass expression is pure Gwenny.

Crap Headline

Now this is a truly crap headline. The grammar there makes my stomach hurt.

STLtoday – News – Illinois News

“After shootings, NIU student from here calls dad”

Bad Fucking Writing, Editors Asleep at the Wheel

Can I submit this somewhere for the worst fucking analogy in a major newspaper, ever? And possibly the stupidest sentence written so far this year? (bolding mine)

The 247 lb. Vegan – WSJ.com

Three weeks later, he walked into the weight room at the Chiefs’ training facility and got a shock. The 100-pound dumbbells he used to easily throw around felt like lead weights.

Felt like lead weights, eh? You don’t say.

So let me make sure I am getting this straight. His weights, they felt really heavy?

… like weights?

I guess the smell finally got to him

Or else he’d listened to Bill O’Reilly and was convinced they didn’t exist.

Homeless Shelter Worker Attacks Two With Chainsaw

“One of our staff members apparently had a mental breakdown — I guess you could say he went ballistic,” said Tom Branham, an employee of the St. Louis branch who was in New Bloomfield to help with sound for the center’s upcoming Freedom Festival. “First he was running around poking people — he poked a guy in the neck with, I think, a pencil — then he came after people with a chain saw*.”

*Ummm, that’s quite a leap to make, I think, from “poke you in the neck with a pencil” to “Going seriously Michael Myers on your ass.”

HOLY SHIT! TOTALLY UNEXEPECTED!

A doctor offers suggestions for treating sick kids

HOooooLLEEEEE SHIT! I mean, I have known of doctors who do a lot of things, but offer suggestions to treat SICK KIDS? What the HELL? I mean, that’s just INSANE!

The Post Dispatch gets fucking lamer every day it’s in existence, I think.

His Buddy Got Charged With “Baseball Bat”

Bad headline of the day, courtesy Yahoo! News:

Man charged with knife at Clinton office

Oooh – suck it FOX! Now you die!

All I want for Christmas is for FOX to stop using my copyrighted photos in their NFL broadcast without asking my permission | Sweetney.com

Executive summary of link: FOX stole a photo of this chick’s dog from her website, doctored it up and used it repeatedly in their Christmas broadcast, all the while flashing big “Don’t steal our shite or you will surely be sued into oblivion!” messages across the screen.

Ha! You know they did that graphic work internally too, with some unpaid, unsupervised intern swiping shite from the net to use in their broadcast, figuring no one would ever notice. Like you couldn’t easily buy about 750 million pug photos from stock sites? I just went over to iStockphoto.com and did a search for “pug” and, aside from many people apparently thinking a chihuahua is some sort of undernourished pug, there’s plenty to choose from. You can have full rights to one of those images for what, $12? But nooooo – you have to steal one from someone’s blog/flickr account? Whatever. It being FOX just makes it alllll so much sweeter to the taste, too.

Not a headline, but still rather crappy

Suggestions for rephrasing are now being accepted. To make clear, an anthropomorphized pickup did not die.

STLtoday – News – Law & Order

A man in a pickup who died Wednesday suffered an attack behind the wheel and swerved across the westbound lanes of Interstate 70 before crashing, police said.

Suicide rate for middle-aged rises 20%

CDC: Suicides among middle-aged spikes – Yahoo! News*

ATLANTA – The suicide rate among middle-aged Americans has reached its highest point in at least 25 years, a new government report said Thursday.
The rate rose by about 20 percent between 1999 and 2004 for U.S. residents ages 45 through 54 — far outpacing increases among younger adults, the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reported.

In 2004, there were 16.6 completed suicides per 100,000 people in that age group. That’s the highest it’s been since the CDC started tracking such rates, around 1980. The previous high was 16.5, in 1982.

Experts said they don’t know why the suicide rates are rising so dramatically in that age group, but believe it is an unrecognized tragedy.

They don’t know why? Money. Money is why. Jesus. How dumb are these “experts”?

*Subject/verb agreement, Yahoo! Google it.