So that cop stopping me has been bothering me all weekend. I really didn’t think I was doing anything wrong, and it freaked me out to be stopped for doing something I didn’t even know I was doing. So I decided to look it up in the MO Drivers Manual just now, and guess what? I WAS DOING IT RIGHT! Totally right! From the manual, page 38:

Exactly what he said not to do is what I was supposed to be doing. What a jackass! He didn’t even know what he was talking about. I am printing this shit out and taking it with me in case that fucker pulls me over again. What an idiot! And made me broody all weekend! Ugh!

I was leaving work today, and as I pulled out of the parking lot I realized that there was a cop not too far behind me. And there are four four-way stop signs between me and the next main street, and no one’s ever at any of those intersections. I determine that I will stop completely at every single one and go 25 MPH on the street, as I am supposed to. So I do. Full stops. Excruciating slowness. Last stop sign I look behind me and the fucking cop has his fucking lights on. What the fuck? So I pull over. He pulls up beside me and says (with an attitude like I am some kind of moronic fuckwit)

“Where did you learn to stop at stop signs?”

I look at him like “Wha?” And then he says to me, for real, that I have been stopping PAST the stop signs, by a FOOT. AT LEAST. I am not stopping level with the stop sign, but the front one-foot of my car is past the stop sign. I don’t know about you, but I stop with the front of my car positioned somewhere between the curb and the stop sign. I don’t know anyone who stops with the front edge of their car directly level with the stop sign. I just gape at him. His attitude is very rude and assholish, he’s gesticulating wildly and talking about how I am “halfway into the intersection” before I stop. And he does this mock ‘looking around cluelessly’ motion, like that’s me in the middle the intersection, looking around and not knowing where I am. Or something. And he’s saying I am stopping “in the middle of the intersection” right after he’s just said I overshot the signs by a foot. Which would make for a smallish intersection. He’s talking to me like I am the most retarded person, doing the most insane thing, that he’s ever seen.

So he’s all berating me, and saying how he’s supposed to write me a ticket (In the meantime, he’s never even left his car. He pulled up next to me and is blocking traffic himself in order to bawl me out through his open passenger window.) Then, weirdly and suddenly his attitude changes. The more I gape at him the more conciliatory he gets. “It’s alright.” he says “I got you covered, I am not going to write you a ticket. But you have to watch out, there’s lots of us out here, and we’re hiding all over the place. We’ll give you a ticket for that.” And I am thinking “Mother-effer, I KNEW you were behind me. That was my cop’s-behind-me stop. WTF?” So I said “Sorry, I had no idea.” And then he tells me to drive carefully and takes off. I am just sitting there like “WTF just happened here?”

I don’t know what his story was, or why he was so rude, then so faux-nice all of a sudden. It was so ODD. I mean, maybe he thought I was a student and could be easily intimidated by him, then saw I was a grown woman. Maybe he thought that in that neighborhood I would be someone who was up to more than over-shooting stop signs and he could drug-bust me. Maybe he was just pissed that there was someone in front of him doing the speed limit and coming to full stops at stop signs like cops NEVER do. It was bizarre. So I drove home. And there are a LOT of four-way stops between work and home, and I watched very carefully to see what other people were doing. Guess what? Everyone stops with their front bumper beyond the stop sign. They stop with their body right behind the stop sign (bumper somewhere between stop sign and curb.) Everyone. And the cop acted like I was the only person who ever did that, and I was like Speed Fucking Racer behind the wheel.

I don’t know. I hate to make generalizations, but cops can really suck. Power-mad weirdos who act all erractic and have the power to arrest you. It’s unsettling.  I’ve been driving for 20 years, I’ve always driven the same way, plenty of cops have seen me stop at a stop sign, FFS, then this one freaks out on me. It makes me feel paranoid and it makes me think cops suck ass, all cops. And I know they don’t, but they need to really stop with the random petty and subjective shit and get to busting all these people who are shooting people.

STLtoday - 4 injured in 4 shootings in StL

Four shootings yesterday. Four separate shootings.This city is insane. Do not linger on the streets, people. It’s not safe.

Favorite badly-written PD sentence in this article has got to be:

The girl and a woman were arguing and a man in a crowd that had gathered fired shots.

That’s not only badly written, that’s also funny in that it makes it seem as if the man got fed up with their arguing and shot at them. Which may or not be the case, actually. Hrm. Must rethink guns as a solution to making people STFU. Though I do understand the urge.

STLtoday - StL logs 100th murder this morning

ST. LOUIS — In what could be the city’s 100th murder this year, a man was shot while sitting in a car Tuesday night and died early this morning, police said.

The man was sitting in his car about 10:11 p.m. Tuesday night, when a man attempted to rob him and then shot him, police said.

Further proof of the St. Louis maxim “Sit thee stationary neither on thy front porch, nor in thy vehicle. For if you do, surely shall ye perish.”

Maybe I am not helping the environment any, but rarely does someone with a Rambo knife pop up behind my seat and decapitate me.

Man decapitates passenger aboard Greyhound bus in Manitoba: witness
“When we came back on the bus, it was visible at the end of the bus he was cutting the guy’s head off and pretty much gutting him up,” said Caton.

The attacker ran at them, Caton said, and they ran out of the bus, holding the door shut as he tried to slash at the trio.

When the attacker tried to drive the bus away, the driver disabled the vehicle, Caton said.

“While we were watching the door, he calmly walks up to the front with the head in his hand and the knife and just calmly stares at us and drops the head right in front of us,” said Caton

Only way to stay safe is to minimize/cut out most contact with strangers and crowds and enclosed spaces. Seriously. Not that people you know are necessarily safer, but at least you may have some idea when they’re going to blow and know where they keep their weapons.

The fuck.

Why I do not now, nor will I ever, ride the Metrolink. At least if I am in my car I can run your thieving, assaulting ass over, motherfucker.

STLtoday - MetroLink riders attacked minutes apart at 2 stations

ST. LOUIS — Police are investigating two violent attacks on MetroLink riders that occurred within minutes of each other late Saturday night at the Delmar and Forest Park stations.

St. Louis police arrested two teens after one of the attacks, officials said. At least three of the victims were taken to area hospitals.

I hate that my Mom and brother ride the Metrolink to the ball games. I think that whole system is a filthy, gang-and-thug-infested attack waiting to happen. When you have a group of 10 violent thugs who have no qualms in attacking *groups* of people, you have a serious problem with your security presence.

And no, I have nothing against public transport, I used it pretty much exclusively when I lived in Europe. But public transport with free and unregulated on/off access which goes to and from some of the most crime-ridden neighborhoods in the country… that’s just a retardedly bad idea. Especially in a city with the murder rate St. Louis has.

Maybe it’s because Metrolink stations look too much like front porches, people think that the riders are asking for it.

(picture is the view from the 6th floor of the criminal courts building)

Sat in voir dire all day but was not selected for the jury. I was impressed with the judge, she was charming and funny, did her best to make an intolerable process more tolerable. I was not impressed with the prosecutor or the defense attorney, they both were rather rambling and unfocused. I was not impressed with my fellow jurors, from what I could tell more than half of them either didn’t brush their teeth or bathe with any regularity. Several of them were more than commonly stupid and had trouble grasping the most basic of concepts regarding the case at hand.

I am extremely glad I did not get picked for the jury, as it was a criminal trial involving forcible rape/sodomy and kidnapping as well as 1st degree assault. I won’t go into any details because the trial is still going on, but I would have found that very hard to sit through, though I would have if necessary.

I was called early, 10 a.m. or so, and the rest of the day was spent in slowly losing the feeling in my ass as I sat on a wooden bench listening to interminable questions about things that really shouldn’t have taken that much clarification. So I didn’t get to read most of the material I brought with me. But I did read a back issue of The Sun, which magazine I dearly love but never make or take the time to read. There was a poem by Ellen Bass titled “Winter Solstice” and these lines were very resonant for me and the way I have been feeling this year:

I am so tempted to wish myself into the future,
the night over, as though life were infinite
and I could afford to throw away the inferior bits—

Isn’t that true? I am wishing away “inferior” bits of my life all the time. I need to either stop wishing them away, or make sure that there are fewer bits I find inferior, I suppose.

I stopped subscribing to The Sun because I would never take the time to read it, and it made me guilty when it sat there untouched. I was thinking that re-subscribing to it would be a good birthday present, but I think a better birthday present might be allotting myself the time to sit down and read it when it arrives - no matter how busy I feel. Can you gift yourself with time?

There was also a quote from Mignon McLaughlin in their “Sunbeams” section that read:

The only courage that matters is the kind that gets you from one moment to the next.

I have not been feeling like a very courageous person lately. But judged by that standard and the fact that I have arrived at this moment, I suppose I am doing OK.

STLtoday - In StL’s latest homicide, man shot on Emerson

A 28-year-old man was shot to death Tuesday night in the 5000 block of Emerson Avenue, St. Louis police say.

…

Police say Bradley had been near the back porch of a home when there was a confrontation with someone.

This is one reason why I love my privacy fence so much. It makes me harder to aim at when I sit on my deck.

STLtoday - In StL’s latest homicide, man shot on Emerson

A 28-year-old man was shot to death Tuesday night in the 5000 block of Emerson Avenue, St. Louis police say.

…

Police say Bradley had been near the back porch of a home when there was a confrontation with someone.

This is one reason why I love my privacy fence so much. It makes me harder to aim at when I sit on my deck.

STLtoday - Man killed in collision during gun battle
By Kim Bell - ST. LOUIS POST-DISPATCH

St. Louis — A gunman who forced his way into a car to escape armed pursuers was killed in a traffic crash during a running gunbattle late Wednesday, police said.

Richard Joy, 37, of the 1200 block of South 11th Street, died at the scene about 11 p.m., after being thrown from a car at Hebert and Parnell streets.

Police said Joy was riding in a Chevrolet Malibu that sped through a stop sign and collided with a van at that intersection. Officers found a .40-caliber gun on the ground a few feet from the wreckage.

Police said the 33-year-old driver of the Malibu told them Joy had jumped into his car at a BP gas station at 1235 North Grand Boulevard and ordered him to drive.

The motorist said Joy was being chased by three men in a dark-colored, four-door vehicle that continued to pursue them, firing shots. He said Joy was returning fire until the collision.

The driver of the Malibu was examined at a hospital and held by police on six city probation violations and a federal probation violation. Police withheld his identity.

The van driver, 27, was treated for unspecified injuries. The shooters in the dark-colored vehicle remained at large.

Joy was a parole absconder wanted by the Missouri Division of Probation and Parole. In December 2004, he pleaded guilty in St. Louis of burglary and robbery and was sentenced to seven years in prison, according to court records. He was paroled in October 2006 but was declared a parole absconder in February.

Joy’s sister-in-law, Joanne Lax, said Thursday he was the youngest of 11 children and leaves behind three children, 16, 4 and 9 months. She said he had been unable to find work since his release from prison, and that his extended family was helping support him.

Best phrase in this article = “parole absconder”  - which I think I am going to incorporate into a lot of my insults from now on.

Also, I know I live in a very violent city, and in a pretty shady part of it. But I NEVER see shit like this happening. I have no idea how I would react if I was tooling down the road and suddenly found myself in the middle of a raging gun battle. I would probably think they were filming a movie and I was an unwilling extra.

Also, chances of this guy just jumping into a car driven by a guy with “six city probation violations and a federal probation violation” are… well, actually pretty good in that part of town.

STLtoday - 3 shot in night of violence for StL

ST. LOUIS POST-DISPATCH - 06/06/2008

A motorist was shot and critically wounded early today in St. Louis, the last of three shootings in a three-hour period.

The driver, 19, was being fired upon near Wells and Arlington avenues about 3 a.m. today. He was shot several times before crashing his car. The young man is expected to die, and St. Louis homicide detectives were called in.

After being hit, the driver struck a parked car in the 5000 block of Martin Luther King Drive and overturned. A girl, 14, was riding with him. She was injured in the crash. Her name and injuries were not disclosed.

St. Louis police say two other men were shot in separate shootings. About 12:30 a.m., a man got in a dispute with a neighbor and was shot in the chest in the 1200 block of Amherst Place. Police say he was critically wounded. That neighbor was arrested for assault.

At 2:10 a.m., a man standing in the 2000 block of Obear Street was shot by someone in a white Chevy. No words on any arrests.

OK here’s the thing - or, one of the things, at least. If I have a 14 year old daughter and she’s out at 3 a.m. riding around in the ghetto with a 19 year old, I have committed a massive FAIL in parenting. This is why I suggest that no one have children, they do the wackiest things.

Also I have to fault “shot in separate shootings” as a proper journalistic sentence. Shot in separate incidents, maybe. But this redundancy makes me wonder what they assume we will think. That they were shot in separate stabbings? Shot in separate square-dancing competitions?

STLtoday - StL County man, 25, slain on porch
ST. LOUIS POST-DISPATCH
05/21/2008

ST. LOUIS — A 25-year-old St. Louis County man was killed Tuesday evening after being shot while sitting on a front porch in the city, police said today.

Jeffery Hughes, of the 10000 block of Durness Drive in north St. Louis County, was shot just before 10 p.m., police said. He died after being shot once in the upper left shoulder, police said.

Police said that Hughes had been sitting on the porch in the 5700 block of Era Avenue in the Walnut Park West neighborhood when witnesses say two men walked from a gangway and began firing shots.

Police were called to the home at 9:58 p.m. Tuesday. Detectives were given sketchy details of the suspects: “Two black males wearing dark clothing.”

The murder is under investigation by the St. Louis Metropolitan Police Departments homicide detectives.

STLtoday - StL County man, 25, slain on porch
ST. LOUIS POST-DISPATCH
05/21/2008

ST. LOUIS — A 25-year-old St. Louis County man was killed Tuesday evening after being shot while sitting on a front porch in the city, police said today.

Jeffery Hughes, of the 10000 block of Durness Drive in north St. Louis County, was shot just before 10 p.m., police said. He died after being shot once in the upper left shoulder, police said.

Police said that Hughes had been sitting on the porch in the 5700 block of Era Avenue in the Walnut Park West neighborhood when witnesses say two men walked from a gangway and began firing shots.

Police were called to the home at 9:58 p.m. Tuesday. Detectives were given sketchy details of the suspects: “Two black males wearing dark clothing.”

The murder is under investigation by the St. Louis Metropolitan Police Departments homicide detectives.

…what a few days of decent weather and copious amounts of sleep can do for one’s mood. I didn’t get out today but I laundered, I vacuumed, I napped, I COOKED, even. Involving pans (multiple) and fresh ingredients! I had the windows open, I walked around the back yard. I snorgled puppies, I didn’t have to clean up any poop in the house. I wore shorts! Life is good.

For this moment in time with wet hair and a tummy full of Pad Thai and clean laundry and sweet-smelling carpets, life is good.

Now, wintry mix is apparently imminent, but maybe they’re wrong about that - who knows? The one thing I am worried about is the “2 days of good weather” effect on the crime rate. Because you know my theory - all these thugs and shitheads have been cooped up for months and then last night it was nice and they got out mixing with each other. Fun right? But then they will inevitably start fighting. Now, if it’s only one day of good weather then that’s the end of it. But tonight’s promised rain did not materialize. If it stays clear through the prime shooting hours of 1-5 a.m. then the peeps with guns (everyone) will go find whoever pissed them off last night and shoot them - maybe right in the apartments, even. I am just saying it’s not going to be a good night to be on your front porch, or sitting in a car idling in front of your own house.

Will be interesting to read the overnight death count in tomorrow morning’s paper.

…what a few days of decent weather and copious amounts of sleep can do for one’s mood. I didn’t get out today but I laundered, I vacuumed, I napped, I COOKED, even. Involving pans (multiple) and fresh ingredients! I had the windows open, I walked around the back yard. I snorgled puppies, I didn’t have to clean up any poop in the house. I wore shorts! Life is good.

For this moment in time with wet hair and a tummy full of Pad Thai and clean laundry and sweet-smelling carpets, life is good.

Now, wintry mix is apparently imminent, but maybe they’re wrong about that - who knows? The one thing I am worried about is the “2 days of good weather” effect on the crime rate. Because you know my theory - all these thugs and shitheads have been cooped up for months and then last night it was nice and they got out mixing with each other. Fun right? But then they will inevitably start fighting. Now, if it’s only one day of good weather then that’s the end of it. But tonight’s promised rain did not materialize. If it stays clear through the prime shooting hours of 1-5 a.m. then the peeps with guns (everyone) will go find whoever pissed them off last night and shoot them - maybe right in the apartments, even. I am just saying it’s not going to be a good night to be on your front porch, or sitting in a car idling in front of your own house.

Will be interesting to read the overnight death count in tomorrow morning’s paper.